How to Get Your Way with Body Language

I recently came across an article about body language written by Brittani Renaud, Health magazine, relating more to dating, but you can use the same techniques in business as I explain below. 


Did you know that the way you stand can make you more persuasive—or more likable to the person you talking to? And the way you hold your arms can be a tip off that you’re tense or just not that interested in what the other person have to say? Send out the best possible message and get people to like you more with these tips below.

Be a copycat

Mirroring someone else’s body language is a great way to show that the two of you are in sync. In fact, when you talk to a close friend, you may find yourself matching his or her posture—when he/she leans forward, you lean forward; he/she takes a sip of her water, you take a sip.

What you are saying to the other person in doing this is that you are feeling comfortable and at ease. And when someone mirrors you, it also calms you. This move can also show empathy. When listening to your child, a friend, or a client describing a problem, matching their posture and tone of voice shows them that you truly understand what they’re going through.

Take up space

Do you keep your arms close to your sides or folded in front of you? This makes your body more compact, which sends out the signal that you’re not only closed but subordinate. When you take up less space, you appear and feel less powerful, and people may treat you that way.

If you want to command respect, whether it’s from a co-worker or a family member, take up a little more space. Remember to stand up straight and relaxed, with your feet 6 to 7 inches apart.

Hold your head up

There’s a good reason why “jump for joy” is a cliché. When you feel happy and confident, your body automatically lifts up. You may raise your head, shoulders and/or chest, and momentarily push up on the balls of your feet. Feeling down? Hold up your head, bring your shoulders back, sit up, and smile. It can change your mood in less than a fraction of a second. Believe it or not, our body movements actually change our feelings.

Watch your arms

Though anything from stress to an overly air-conditioned room may prompt you to cross your arms, people assume you’re trying to keep something inside or someone out when you get in this stance. You might unconsciously do it at a party to keep others at bay or at work as a way of holding back your real opinion. To appear more approachable, leave arms by your sides or gesture with them.

Open up

Always reach out with open palms and make gestures with your palm facing out. Similarly, turning the upper part of your chest toward a person and pointing your toes toward him/her show a desire to connect.

As always,


MY GOAL…YOUR SUCCESS!

You Are Great!

One of the most well-known confidence building exercises is to list your own strengths and natural abilities.


By looking at the list it can make you say “Wow, I really am good!”

Another great way of building your confidence and getting in touch with how great you really are is to ask friends, colleagues and people who you know for feedback on your strengths and natural abilities.

Your practical assignment is to list 5 people who you know and trust for this exercise.

Make sure they are from different areas of your life.

List them below:

1.   A FAMILY MEMBER
2.   A FRIEND
3.   A WORK COLLEAGUE
4.   AN ASSOCIATE
5.   A SOCIAL CONTACT

You might at this stage be feeling a little nervous about asking these people for feedback.

Don’t worry, because you will be only asking for your strengths.

JUST GO FOR IT!

So, how do you go about it?

Well, below is a list of questions that I’d like you to ask from each on your list.

I recommend that you meet or talk on the phone with each beforehand and explain the context of the exercise and then either ask them verbally or give them the questions and either fill in the sheet of paper or email you with their feedback.

They will feel honoured that you have asked them and the feedback that you will receive will truly make you feel fabulous and full of confidence.

Rightly or wrongly, we live in a society where other peoples’ opinions count toward our self esteem and confidence.

By completing this exercise you will get some really good insight into some of your strengths.

Often you receive valuable information on strengths that you didn’t even know you had!

EXTERNAL FEEDBACK QUESTIONS

·   What do you perceive to be my greatest strengths?
·   What do you like most about me?
·   What do you value most about me?
·   What three words sum up the positive points about me?
·   If you needed help with something, what would you call me to help you with?

After you have received all of the feedback it is now time to reflect on what has been written or said:

How do you feel about it?

Are there any surprises?

Do you feel confident about your abilities?

How can you use this information in going forward?

How can you maximise your strengths?

If these people think you have these strengths, so do a lot of other people as well – how does that make you feel?

What are the key insights you have learned?

What will you do now that is different to what you have done before?

Do this exercise and realize that you are more that what you think you are and that you are really a good person.

As always,

MY GOAL – YOUR SUCCESS