How Forgiving Yourself Can Motivate You to Achieve Your Goals

Why do so many of us have the tendency to be really hard on ourselves, especially when we have a hard time achieving our goals?

Are you being too demanding with your expectations? If so, forgive yourself!

Remember that you’re only human and you are bound to be hard on yourself from time to time. At the same time, make a commitment to go a little easier on yourself. It’s okay to push yourself out of your comfort zones and strive for growth and progress, but there is no need to bully yourself into achieving the goals you’ve set. Do what you can, try to do better than you’ve done in the past, and let your progress happen more naturally. With a slightly more relaxed approach, you may find your motivation returning naturally also!

As always,

MY GOAL – YOUR SUCCESS!

One Powerful Problem-Solving and Decision-Making Skill

Today I want to share with you one skill that I use to successfully solve problems and make decisions.

Problem-solving and decision-making are very important skills for both in business and in life. Problem-solving often involves decision-making and is especially important for management and leadership whether you are working for someone or for yourself.

Problem-solving and decision–making are closely linked and each requires creativity in identifying and developing options for which the “brainstorming technique” is particularly useful.

There are many different types of analysis models you can use. The one that I use to help me with this process is the SWOT analysis. It helps me assess the strength of my company, my life, my coaching clients and ways we can improve and reach our goals.

What is a SWOT analysis?

SWOT analysis looks at your strengths and weaknesses, and the opportunities and threats your business faces. You can use the same analysis for your life.

By focusing on the key factors affecting your business, now and in the future, a SWOT analysis provides a clear basis for examining your business performance and prospects.

In SWOT, strengths and weaknesses are internal factors.

For example:

Strengths could be:

• Your specialist marketing expertise.
• A new, innovative product or service.
• A specific skill that you have to offer.
• Any other aspect of your business or your personality that adds value to your life, product or service.

Weaknesses could be:

• Lack of marketing expertise.
• Undifferentiated products or services.
• Lack of self belief.
• Poor quality goods or services.
• Damaged reputation.

In SWOT, opportunities and threats are external factors.

For example:

Opportunities could be:

• A developing market such as the Internet.
• Personal development.
• Mergers, joint ventures or strategic alliances.
• Moving into new market segments that offer improved profits.
• A new international market.
• A market vacated by an ineffective competitor.

Threats could be:

• A new competitor in your home market.
• Price wars with competitors.
• A competitor has a new, innovative product or service.
• Competitors have superior access to channels of distribution.

Six simple rules for a successful SWOT analysis.

• Be realistic about the strengths and weaknesses of your organization when conducting SWOT analysis.
• SWOT analysis should distinguish between where your organization is today, and where it could be in the future.
• SWOT should always be specific. Avoid grey areas.
• Always apply SWOT in relation to your competition, i.e. better than or worse than your competition.
• Keep your SWOT short and simple. Avoid complexity and over analysis.
• SWOT is subjective.

As always,

MY GOAL – YOUR SUCCESS!

Refocusing After Setbacks

How many times have you started a diet, a new way of thinking, or tried something new and then a setback occurs and you just go back to the way you were?

Don’t worry; you are not the only one! Setbacks and difficulties occur all of the time – they are a natural activity of life.

There are two ways of facing difficulties:

1.    You change or alter the difficulty.

2.    You alter yourself to be able to deal with it.

Deal with difficulties correctly and it will enhance your confidence. Deal with them incorrectly and they can do some serious damage to your self-worth.

Your response to issues and difficulties

When you are faced with any setback your ability to deal with it can be turned around into a position of strength by asking yourself positive empowering questions.

There is an unwritten rule that says:

Ask your mind a silly question and you will get a silly answer!

So, if after setback you ask yourself something like: “Why does this always happen to me, I never have any luck?”

Your mind will probably come out with: “Because you are useless and good things do not happen to you!”

Sound familiar?

Instead, if you ask yourself a positive empowering question like: “What did I learn from this setback for next time?”

Your mind will kick into solution mode and help.

Here are some rules and things to think about when setbacks do occur:

• Acknowledge that it has happened. Don’t hide from it. These things happen. So what?
• What positive empowering questions can you ask yourself?

What is good about this situation?

How can I make the most of this situation?

What can I learn from it?

What are the facts about this problem?

How can I make it a successful outcome?

• Acknowledge that setbacks occur to everyone and you are not being singled out.
• View them as a challenge to overcome rather than an issue or problem.

Think about the negative disempowering thoughts that you think on a regular basis after a setback.

What new empowering questions could you ask yourself to give some better answers?

Write these down now and make them a habit.

As always,

MY GOAL – YOUR SUCCESS!

How Running Teaches me to Get “In The Zone” – Here are 3 Tips.

On my recent visit to South Africa I enjoyed the times when I went for my daily run along the beach. Whilst running, the thought came to mind that in order for me to be able to run faster and longer, I need to get “in the zone” where I am so focused on what I am doing that I feel invincible and almost run as if there is no end and nothing can stop me. This made me feel happy, full of energy, relaxed and in control. While having this feeling I was thinking about how we can get ourselves “in the zone” in everything we do -- if for a sporting event, speaking event, seminar, business, in life or just anything you need to accomplish.

Here are three short tips you can use:

1.    Preparation: Just as with running, in everything you do you need a solid foundation. Preparation is that foundation stone. You need to set your goal and game plan for that special occasion or goal. Map out your plan and keep your eye on the end result, always making the necessary adjustments along the way.

2.    Visualise success: You need to vividly imagine achieving your end result; your goal. With running you need to visualise crossing the line, hearing the applause, getting that medal. So it is in all the goals you set for yourself. Visualise the small steps you achieved along your journey of achieving that goal. Visualise the end result, the reward (whatever that might be), and how proud you and everyone associated with your goal are. The unconscious mind doesn’t differentiate between a real experience and a vividly imagined one, so rehearsing a positive outcome brings you closer to achieving it. Do this every day.

3.    Give yourself a pep talk: Psychologists estimate that we conduct a steady stream of internal conversation with ourselves amounting to around 300 words a minute. We know that negative thoughts produce negative outcomes. However the opposite is just as true: positive thoughts and feelings lead to high self-belief and positive results. It’s often mental muscle that gives you the power to edge ahead of your competitors, whether in sport or in business.

As always,

MY GOAL – YOUR SUCCESS!

5 Simple Reasons for Breaking a Bad Habit and How to do it!

Whatever the bad habit is you want to get rid of whether it’s a perpetual pile of clothes in the corner you’re waiting to someday turn into gold, procrastination, smoking, a self-proclaimed disability which renders you unable to refrain from interrupting, or, a knack for timing your exit just so, so that someone else is continually left to do the dishes, now’s the time to extinguish these habits before they turn into next year’s resolutions. 

Why?

1. It’s not fair to others

One of the great universal laws ruling our wonderful planet says that you get back what you put out there. 

Want others to be kind and considerate to you? 

Then start putting the considerate, kind vibes out there and pick up your clothes, your dishes, and stop interrupting or whatever it is you or a collective “others” define as a bad habit.

2. It’s not fair to you

I’m sure you’re a nice person, and you pride yourself on having generous, warmhearted traits. 

So, it’s not fair to you either that this simple, little, annoying thing you do can wield the power that it now, or will soon have. 

These tiny culprits have been known to ruin marriages, friendships, and cause the downfall of many a mighty person. 

Plus you’ll feel better about yourself.

3. Your success depends on it

Bad habits have a funny way of scope and context creep. 

First they only happen in certain situations, and the next thing you know, you’re at a business function swirling your fingers through the chip dip.

Put an end to it now before situations that require your utmost polish become tarnished by these terribly annoying little critters.

4. You probably don’t like it when others do the same thing

Think about it.  If someone did the same thing to you, would it bother you?

Be honest. 

Sometimes all it takes is a simple exercise in empathy to find the motivation to quit whatever it is we could benefit from stopping.

5. List your own reasons

But be sincere. 

What is it costing you to perpetuate these habits? 

Whether it’s a moment of peace, seemingly perpetual nagging, or simple anxiety resulting from anticipation of the next blow-up or negative comment, you owe it to yourself to commit to your ongoing personal development, and to the elimination of any behavior whose costs far outweigh the benefits.

So how does one begin?

Just like breaking a smoking habit, bad habits have a way of creeping up on us and slowly over time becoming somewhat akin to an appendage—i.e. they’re hard to get rid of. 

Here are some tips for breaking these bad habits:

Start small: 

While it might not be reasonable to expect that you can just stop whatever you’re doing overnight, identify what might constitute as a small step in the right direction?

Write down what that step is and carry it out over the next 21 days.

For example, if you are smoking 40 a day, cut that down to 20 for the next 21 days.

Make that behavior a habit before you cut that down to 15 for the next 21 days and then 10 and so on.

Commit: 

Promise yourself you’ll make this shift, and if reinforcement and punishment works—use it! 

Figure out how you might reward yourself for making the change.  Or, figure out how you might penalize yourself if you don’t.

Let’s take our smoking example. Put the money you would have spent on the cigarettes in a jar and at the end of the 21 days add it all up and buy yourself a treat for example.

From cutting down to 20 smokes a day from 40 smokes a day, over a 21-day period at $4 a packet that will save you $80 in just 3 weeks!

Also, write two lists, one, of the reasons why you are doing this and also a list of the things that you will miss out on if you keep on doing your bad habit.

Identify alternatives: 

What are some alternatives to the behavior you are demonstrating? 

Is there a quick fix or solution that might help provide an alternative—e.g. put a laundry basket by the bedside (one to match with the décor) so that you don’t end up with a pile on the floor.

Get help: 

Ask someone to help keep you accountable.  

If they’ve been victims of this bad habit, they’ll most likely be thrilled you asked!

Ask for feedback: 

Because human nature dictates that we will only complain when you offend, rather than amend, ask for feedback frequently. 

Don’t assume, no news is good news, but be sure to get praise when praise is due.

As always,

MY GOAL – YOUR SUCCESS!